For as long as I can remember, I’ve wanted to be a Mummy. Now, I realise that I am extremely fortunate in that this wish has come true for me and I have a gorgeous little
monkey treasure who is about to turn my entire head of hair grey three.
Unfortunately, for me, we started our family quite a few years later than I would have ideally liked, meaning that my options for more children are now (in my mind at least) cut back a bit. I used to dream of having six (!) children (I know, I know) but now, after experiencing how much hard work goes into parenting and raising a polite, confident and bright little person, I’m happy to settle for three.
I’ve always thought that the ‘ideal gap’ was two years so that’s obviously passed us by. However, after speaking with other parents, both on Twitter and in the flesh, I’ve been reliably informed that there is no such thing as the ‘ideal gap’ and it’s all about how you, as a parent, deal with the situations that can arise from having two or more children, no matter what the age difference.
‘Great!’ I thought, ‘I’m not the best Mother around, but I’m not the worst either. I’m a ‘Work-in-Progress’, learning as I go, and Big Man is a fantastic father, we’ll be grand, let’s crack on!’
So now I’m broody, and I don’t mean looking at babies, coo-ing and thinking ‘How lovely, I’d like another one of those please’. I mean I’m broody to the extent that seeing lickle bubbas on TV or out and about almost brings me to the point of tears. I feel intense jealousy towards ladies announcing they’re pregnant or sharing their scan pictures and I can’t stand the fact that I’ve become that person. Jealousy is not a character trait I like in others and I certainly don’t like to feel it myself.
Hopefully, I’ll be one of those ladies myself before too long, but what can I do in the meantime to stop myself becoming so upset, moody & a horrible envious person? Has anyone else felt this way? Is it just my biological clock ticking louder and louder, reminding me that I shouldn’t be hanging around? Would love your comments.